08 July 2010 - When One Really Grows Up
I came across a story that I heard from someone, and I would like to share it with all the readers here.
often at our age, between 20 to 30, we would probably have considered ourselves to be adults. physically that may be true, but what about the mental part? it may not be the case.
in the growing up process where one really becomes mature which is one of the toughest things in life, it all begins with the simplest things in life...like volunteering to help your mother with housework (if you don't have a maid) all of a sudden especially when you have never done it at all. your mother's first reaction would probably be "gosh is this my child?! has he/she grown up??" such miracles do happen I would say. these simple things, train your determination, your mentality, and ultimately gets rid of the laziness in you.
in work, we face all sorts of people, from those very friendly to those damn nasty ones. usually, when you ask help from someone nasty, they probably wouldn't help you. so the norm would be, you wouldn't do them a favour as well if they ever need one from you. but what about if...someone nasty who once didn't help you, suddenly needs you to do something for him/her, and that you are still willing to help without making complaints?
the point is - how would the nasty person feel and think? instead of having the thoughts that the person takes you for granted, the more possible conclusion is that the person may feel that, you are actually someone who is worth helping. so no matter how nasty that person is, he/she would give you a hand when you need help again one day, and be supportive of you more or less.
when someone is nasty to you, and you are willing to control your temper and be at absolute calm even after everything, thats when you have already grown up. unless that person is going overboard, and keeps bombarding nonsense for no particular reason then yes, go ahead and argue about it. because that guy probably did not give a second thought before he/she created that nonsense.
another thing is, when you are nasty to someone, do you actually feel how they feel? most people don't, that includes myself most of the time. when it comes to teaching, there are 3 kinds of people
1) one who learns/listen through proper talking, probably from anyone
2) one who learns/listen through nasty scoldings from the higher ups
3) one who learns/listen nothing despite those two methods from anyone
of course, the third kind of people are long hopeless. but the first two are still able to learn and listen, though the methods are different.
all these, are endurance/tolerance. it is not easy to really apply everything above, even though talking about it seems easy. temperamental control, determination, and the many things you need to overcome. when you have more responsibilities, the stress loaded on work is greater. but it is exactly because of all these that you need to learn and overcome, you become more mature.
the conclusion I got for myself at the end of the day after hearing the story is that,
I am actually very short tempered instead of someone who have loads of patience.
I get pissed off very easily when I get distracted, especially when sales gone bad.
I'm smart because I learn things I like fast,
but I get lazy and complacent sometimes.
I'm far from being mature as of now. only when I'm able to really endure and tolerate, then I would probably consider myself as a grown up.
I still have loads to learn.
its a start for me now, to learn all these step by step. call it a pre-mental training before I step into NS perhaps.
P.S: The time where I blogged is utterly insane.
often at our age, between 20 to 30, we would probably have considered ourselves to be adults. physically that may be true, but what about the mental part? it may not be the case.
in the growing up process where one really becomes mature which is one of the toughest things in life, it all begins with the simplest things in life...like volunteering to help your mother with housework (if you don't have a maid) all of a sudden especially when you have never done it at all. your mother's first reaction would probably be "gosh is this my child?! has he/she grown up??" such miracles do happen I would say. these simple things, train your determination, your mentality, and ultimately gets rid of the laziness in you.
in work, we face all sorts of people, from those very friendly to those damn nasty ones. usually, when you ask help from someone nasty, they probably wouldn't help you. so the norm would be, you wouldn't do them a favour as well if they ever need one from you. but what about if...someone nasty who once didn't help you, suddenly needs you to do something for him/her, and that you are still willing to help without making complaints?
the point is - how would the nasty person feel and think? instead of having the thoughts that the person takes you for granted, the more possible conclusion is that the person may feel that, you are actually someone who is worth helping. so no matter how nasty that person is, he/she would give you a hand when you need help again one day, and be supportive of you more or less.
when someone is nasty to you, and you are willing to control your temper and be at absolute calm even after everything, thats when you have already grown up. unless that person is going overboard, and keeps bombarding nonsense for no particular reason then yes, go ahead and argue about it. because that guy probably did not give a second thought before he/she created that nonsense.
another thing is, when you are nasty to someone, do you actually feel how they feel? most people don't, that includes myself most of the time. when it comes to teaching, there are 3 kinds of people
1) one who learns/listen through proper talking, probably from anyone
2) one who learns/listen through nasty scoldings from the higher ups
3) one who learns/listen nothing despite those two methods from anyone
of course, the third kind of people are long hopeless. but the first two are still able to learn and listen, though the methods are different.
all these, are endurance/tolerance. it is not easy to really apply everything above, even though talking about it seems easy. temperamental control, determination, and the many things you need to overcome. when you have more responsibilities, the stress loaded on work is greater. but it is exactly because of all these that you need to learn and overcome, you become more mature.
the conclusion I got for myself at the end of the day after hearing the story is that,
I am actually very short tempered instead of someone who have loads of patience.
I get pissed off very easily when I get distracted, especially when sales gone bad.
I'm smart because I learn things I like fast,
but I get lazy and complacent sometimes.
I'm far from being mature as of now. only when I'm able to really endure and tolerate, then I would probably consider myself as a grown up.
I still have loads to learn.
its a start for me now, to learn all these step by step. call it a pre-mental training before I step into NS perhaps.
P.S: The time where I blogged is utterly insane.
Written on 5:44 AM
The Author
Kelvin Yeo's the name
21
I'm nothing extraordinary
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